It’s About What You Expected

by Tom Swift

Everyone has an opinion about Mondays. Love ’em (some) or loathe ’em (most).

Wednesday has it own nickname. Hump Day. It’s maybe not the sort of nickname you wish for when you’re a kid on the playground. And, as an adult, it might keep first dates at arm’s length. But, hey — it’s better than nothing.

Thursday has promise. Only one more day, you can say to yourself and, more likely, to that coworker in the break room (back when people worked in offices), then it will be Friday!

Friday. ‘Nuf said.

On Saturday we sigh happy sighs.

Sunday is Fun Day.

But Tuesday? It’s the underrated (not rated?), overlooked (properly so?), under-appreciated (appropriately disregarded?) lacking in all distinction day. It’s the Kevin Pollack of days. People have stronger views on tartar sauce than they do about Tuesday, it seems.

So often when I get curious about something and I research that thing I am struck by all that I do not know — by all the connections that can be made. Almost without fail, I encounter surprising and interesting facts that I can use to annoy people with on public transit.

Not so much with Tuesday.

According to Wikipedia, the English name “Tuesday” is derived from Old English Tiwesdæg and Middle English Tewesday, meaning “Tīw’s Day,” the day of Tiw or Týr, god of “single combat,” and law and justice in Norse Mythology.

Yawn. Besides, my musket is in the shop.

In the nursery rhyme “Monday’s Child,” Tuesday’s child is, of course, full of grace.

So there’s that.

Tuesday is associated with the planet Mars and shares that planet’s symbol — which I thought was the symbol for the men’s room (sorry, lady!). As Mars rules over Aries and Scorpio, these signs are also associated with Tuesday. As I am a Scorpio, I guess I have to respect Tuesday. But that doesn’t mean I have to like it.

A search for famous people named Tuesday turned up just one result: Tuesday Lynn Knight. I must confess that I did not know Ms. Knight met the criteria. She is, according to Babynology.com, “an American actress who has appeared in films and on television.” Babynology lists her most prominent role as that of Kristen Parker in A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master.

OK, then.

What is Tuesday good for anyway? Why do we continue to keep this day on the weekly calendar? Should we maybe ditch it for something more in line with the times? Something the kids can better identify with? We spend 1/7th of our lives on Tuesdays. Seems we need to make this work.

Let’s see …

Tuesday: a good day for coffee. That few days are bad days for coffee is not the point we want to focus on here. We’re trying to be positive.

Tuesday: the day you recover from the jarring you experienced on Monday.

Tuesday: because Tue is better than one!

Tuesday: at least one politician every four years thinks it’s super.

Tuesday: the day J. Wellington Wimpy (from Popeye fame) pays you back for all those hamburgers.

OK, I give up. I will leave you with this, by way of comedian Chris Rock:

“They don’t want you to vote. If they did, we wouldn’t vote on a Tuesday.  In November. You ever throw a party on a Tuesday? No. Because nobody would come.”